Photo Credit: Ano Lobb

“Unfulfilled desires are dangerous forces.” – Sarah Tarleton Colvin

What tempts you? Maybe it is the latest get-rich-quick scheme you read about on-line. Maybe it’s sex, power or prestige. Or possibly it’s money, possessions or a favorite dessert. When most people hear the word “temptation,” it stirs up thoughts of a wild torrid affair, a piece of chocolate, playing hooky, or taking a spontaneous trip where you leave it all behind.

In our Judeo-Christian culture we often hear the Bible verse, “Lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.” So, I ask, does temptation always lead us to evil and are the things you want bad? Temptation has a bad reputation, and maybe for good reason, as sometimes there can be devastating consequences to the choices and actions made. But I believe the things people want are not bad, it’s the context or circumstances in which they want them. And it can inform them about a deeper holistic desire.

So, what do you want? What if you could be curious about the desire that has been ignited within you? What if you could embrace the yearning long enough to see if the current opportunities can lead you into new growth? Maybe longing for passion is pointing you toward more intimacy with your partner. Wanting a new job could be about the desire for more freedom and autonomy. Perhaps your temptation is simply about the need to connect to yourself.

Part of my coaching technique allows me to help my clients examine their beliefs so they can make decisions about what to do with the things they crave most. Beliefs are created based on experiences and relationships, as well as how people are shaped by family, teachers, religious or spiritual leaders, media and books. There are “rules” to play by, but sometimes even those need to be examined so that you can mature and discover your true authenticity. Beliefs are not good or bad; they either limit you and hold you back or empower you and move you forward.

Here are some guidelines around being tempted and doing something about it to move your life forward:

Wake Up to what is being awakened within… What passions need to be expressed? What or who is stirring your soul so much so that you feel like you are doing exactly what you are supposed to be doing?

Follow Your Urges Take chances, activate courage and try something new just for the sake of it. Say “yes” as often as possible.

Be Conscious about your decisions. You are always in choice, even if is simply in your attitude and thinking. And, don’t let FEAR be in charge.

Know Your Line Be fierce for you and what you stand for. Stay true to yourself, and don’t compromise. Say yes when you mean yes and no when you mean no. Also, know that you can move your line… just know how far and why you are moving it.

Follow Your Intuition Get quiet and let your body inform you. When we experience a sense of peace and comfort in our bodies, we are in alignment with our thoughts, feelings and decisions.

Cause No Harm to yourself, others or your surroundings. There is no room for living a life of guilt or creating future amends for yourself.

Savor Your Current Life Find joy and appreciate all that you have and do. Feel the textures and see the palette of colors before you. You might discover something new that already exists.

My clients tell me about their temptations and are often looking for someone to give them permission to follow their passions and dreams, to do something different. I give 100 percent full permission after making sure they are truly honoring themselves. I say go for it AND take 100 percent responsibility for your choices and actions. I am not here to judge. I leave that up to my client and their conscience, sacred contracts, and commitments made with self, God and others. I am simply a catalyst for awareness and authentic action.

Coaching Questions to Tempt Authenticity:

1. What is enticing and tantalizing enough to take big risks for your own happiness?

2. What is the distinction between feeling good and being fulfilled?

3. What are the “beliefs” or “rules” you have that are no longer serving you?

4. List five things you truly desire, and give in to your temptations.

Meet Jennifer: Life Coach, Inspirational Speaker and Author Jennifer M. Blair is founder of Excavive™ Coaching and Consulting, based in Louisville, Kentucky. Her work focuses on empowering people to pursue their passions, increase their self-confidence, communicate powerfully and build the kind of lives they want to live. If you love these Blog posts, many have been adapted from her first book, The True You: Tools to Excavate, Explore and Evolve, published in 2011.

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