Photo Credit: E. Johnson

“The greatest gift you will ever have is your life, and the second greatest gift, which you give yourself, is courage to live it to the fullest. Time goes by quickly, and you cannot take it for granted. Appreciate how far you have come, and give yourself the gift of discovering how far you can yet go.”   – Dr. Sonya Freidman

What makes you feel good? The fleeting moments, the guilty pleasures, the favorite activities, the silly amusements, the little indulgences? There are many things that you can do to make yourself FEEL better in the moment.  Sometimes those things are only temporary or fleeting. But what if those things stop working?

What makes you feel good are your authentic preferences. You must search inside, find your inner truth and make conscious choices. Are you fulfilling your soul’s deepest longing and purpose? If your answer is no, why not? Feeling good is a choice AND knowing and believing you have options. You must make decisions based on trusting yourself.  Nothing feels better than the freedom to choose what is right for you, to be empowered, to exercise your free will and to let your inner beauty shine through.

People come to me who have become disenchanted by life circumstances or disempowered by others based on misunderstandings, lack of communication, financial dependence, seeking approval, trying to keep peace, or not wanting to hurt or disappoint another person.  They have become the sum of their life choices, yet they keep making the same mistakes.

I often hear people say, “I don’t have a choice.” Yet, I believe you do. You get to decide how you show up in the world. Your current circumstances may not allow you to do and get everything you want now, but you can certainly begin to create what is next and make a new plan. In every moment, you are in choice with your thoughts, your feelings, your beliefs, your attitudes and your actions… those are yours and cannot be taken away.

Coaching can help you understand what will ultimately fulfill you, as well as give you the permission, the tools, the communication skills and the freedom to start moving your life forward. The process allows you to create powerful choices and actions based on who and what you want to be, how you want to do something, who you want to do it with and when you want to get started. Choosing an old pattern or behavior can make you feel bad and it denies you the opportunity for transformation and growth. Unless you start exercising your freedom of choice and basking in the beauty that awaits you, you will remain imprisoned, believing you have little control over your destiny or dreams.

The Choice is Yours:

Be Honest with Yourself Are you feeling good about where you are in your life and who you have evolved into?  Are you living the life you truly want to experience?

Keep Your Integrity  Don’t let someone else’s attitudes become yours if they do not ring true for you. What do YOU think? Make your actions and words meet.

Let It Be Don’t control, fix or try to change others. Keep the focus on you.

Set Boundaries and Learn to say NO!  What others think of you is not your concern.

Change your Mind You have the right to make a different choice based on new information and situations.

Use Your VoiceSpeak up and ask for what you want. Don’t be a doormat or let anyone run over you.

Self-Care is CriticalGet your needs met and connect to those you love. Stay grounded.

Be Grateful for What You Have in Every Moment Create a list of everything for which you are thankful.

Choose happiness and joy, purpose and passion, forgiveness and compassion. Examine the energy and impact of people, places and things that currently exist in your life–the good for you versus the bad for you–and choose the good. Decide to say yes to you and no to the bad behavior of others. Choose to live a life that is fruitful, abundant and completely used up in the end. Commit to living your deepest dreams and desires… moment-by-moment, step-by-step… one choice at a time.

Coaching Questions to Get Empowered Around Your Choices:

1.How are you using your voice to say what you want and how you feel? Count the number of times you speak powerfully each and every day until speaking strongly becomes a habit.

2. Notice every time you use the word “should”… is it truly what you want or a different version of what you think you are supposed to do, say, think or feel?

3. Who are the “energy vampires” in your life, and what are you willing to do to make those relationships different?  What are you tolerating?

4. Are you being nice or are you being real? (I know this one… I’m a Southern girl!)

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